10-4 Magazine - For Today's Trucker

NOVEMBER 2005 TRUCKER TALK
ONE FOR THE GUYS
By Writers and Owner Operators Rod & Kim Grimm

For years it’s been dad leaving home sometimes for weeks at a time, calling every night, but missing a lot of good night kisses, school plays, ball games and kids going from toddler to graduation. Pictures of the kids on the visor are how so many drivers have watched their kids grow up over the years. But things are changing.

Today, drivers who are dads are working a lot harder to have more of a role in their family besides just being the one out earning the money. A perfect example of this is Darian Stephens. Since his son Devon came along, he tries to get home and spend as much time as possible with him. The companies’ rider program is important to him because it allows him to take Devon along with him sometimes. This is very important to Darian. He wants his son to know him and what he does, and he doesn’t want to miss out on much of his life as he’s growing up.

Darian is a first class showman who’s been known to wear a tux and top hat when showing his very impressive “Keystone JR” Freightliner. Over the years I’ve watched him polish and pamper that truck at every stop (not just at the shows – at the fuel islands as well), and I think it would be safe to say that he loved that truck more than anything – until little Devon came along – now it’s a distant number two. Watching Darian’s face as he told us about his son one night while having supper in Stockton, California, let me tell you, that is one very proud father! As they say, this little guy is the light of his life, and he really wants to be the best dad he can be – and still drive a truck.

Being a trucking dad can be a real challenge, but with good planning and a deep desire and commitment to make it work, it can be done. Companies today realize that home time for a lot of drivers is as important as their pay. For all the benefits we have as drivers (freedom, independence, travel, etc), the flip side is the things we give up to do it. So to get and keep the really good drivers, many companies are now offering this most important benefit – home time.

Home time is really important for another friend of ours, Jeff Zarling. To be able to spend as much time as possible with his eight year old son Derek is what it’s all about for Jeff. He sees his son every other week on Tuesday and Wednesday when he gets back from his run.

Having Derek ride along in the truck in the summer is a real treat for both father and son. And not only is Derek’s dad a driver, but his grandpa Doug is also a driver. Derek sometimes gets to ride with grandpa when he’s running near home. Derek really enjoys that time with his grandpa.

Doug and Jeff have occasionally been able to run together as a team. Jeff told me that his dad didn’t encourage or discourage him from becoming a driver, and he will do the same with Derek. If driving turns out to be what Derek wants to do, he’ll help him all that he can, but the choice will be totally his.

Our next great truck-driving dad is Wendell Foss. Actually, he’s a truck-driving grandpa. Wendell loves spending time with his grandson Kody. For Kody, getting to go out on the road with grandma and grandpa is something he looks forward to every summer. This summer, Rod and I had the pleasure of running with Wendell and his wife Lynda when Kody was along. He loves all the time he gets to spend with papa (Wendell). Kody’s sister Aspen is only one year old, so she has to wait until she is a little older and out of diapers to get to go along. Kody’s cousin Kaleb is hoping to get to go out with them next summer. Kaleb’s mom Brandy (Lynda’s daughter) isn’t sure about letting him go out yet, but she knows that he’ll be in good hands and have a GREAT time when he does. Lynda told me, “It makes my heart melt when I see Wendell with our grandkids.” What a difference just one or two generations can make.

When Kody gets home from the summer road trip, he has the coolest summer vacation stories to tell when school starts. Last summer he got to pick up giant pine cones on top of Donner Pass and this summer he was in shorts standing in six inches of snow on June 4th! But for Kody, the best part of the trip is all the time he gets to spend with papa.

Another doting grandpa is Russ Brown. When talking about his new little granddaughter, Katlyn, he just lights up. She has a little leather jacket that matches grandpa’s and she loves to sit on his Harley. At only two years old, Russ wants to spend as much time as possible with her. He’s well aware of how fast the years go by and the fact that you can’t go back and do it over if you miss something important. Katlyn loves grandma and grandpa’s truck, and, when she gets in it, she never wants to get out. She got to take a short ride with grandpa recently and didn’t want it to end.

These guys (and so many others) have come a long way baby! From changing diapers to having a lot more to do with decisions involving their kids, today’s trucking dads are a lot more involved. They enjoy spending more quality time with their kids and sharing their chosen profession with them. This helps the kids to better understand what their dad is all about and to appreciate what he does for them to provide the things they need – like a roof over their head, food to eat, clothes to wear, and most important, love.

Not that many years ago, truck-driving dads didn’t want to do all these things, or sometimes they did but it just wasn’t possible. What a great change in attitude! And I for one think it’s a good thing. Drivers provide a valuable service – this country would come to a quick standstill without truckers – and these kids should be proud of their dads that go help move America. Someone else’s dad or grandpa helped deliver the food and products that they need and use every day. Doing this important job shouldn’t cost you your family life – and a lot of drivers today aren’t letting it.

If your family is scattered across the country, this is one job that can afford you the opportunity to see them once in awhile or, depending on your company and/or the route you run, you may get to see them often. The companies that allow younger riders are letting these kids have such a leg up when they get in school. These kids have actually seen things – not just read about them in books or saw them on television. The road makes for some great history lessons. And it’s always exciting for the kids when a show comes on the television and they can say, “I’ve been there,” or, “I’ve seen that!”

The guys today are doing a great job. Being a dad or a grandpa and a truck driver is not always easy, but it sure can be rewarding. And, really – it’s okay not to be so big and tough all the time and to let your family know that you love them by actually showing it!