KEN'S KORNER - OCTOBER 2005

THE DRIVING PSYCHIC
By Author, Educator and Big City Driver Ken Skaggs

Picture, if you will, that you’re having a sleepless night. It’s three o’clock in the morning and you’re lying there with one eye open, surfing the channels for something that will help you sleep. Then, you come upon an infomercial. Your host is an elderly, affluent man with a strange part in his hair, who looks like he’s from Transylvania, circa 1792.

As your index finger leans toward the channel-changing button, you realize that there is something familiar about his eyes; something intriguing. The camera zooms in on him and you wonder about those eyes. So you watch, if only for a little while. Your other eye opens as you wonder why he looks so familiar. You realize that he looks like a vampire with that hair and that red and black cape, everything about him, except for the teeth. The teeth are all wrong and too normal. But those eyes, they look like somebody you know - they look like, your Fathers? No, not your Father’s eyes... your eyes! (Please read the rest of this article out-loud using your best Dracula accent)

I am the driving psychic. Call me now, for your free reading. I can tell your future by watching you drive. I can see a lot about your personality too. Come and be amazed, while I recall specific things about your past, present and future. I don’t have a 900 number - I don’t need one - I’m psychic, remember? So, step right up and don’t be afraid. You don’t have to show me your palm and no credit card is necessary. (He sits down at a small antique table with nothing but a glass ball on it)
I see in my crystal ball that you drive a lot, every day, hundreds of miles, day after day. Oh, I also see that most of the time you drive very safely. I can see very clearly that you pride yourself in your ability to maneuver that very large vehicle which you drive. I see that you are as one with your vehicle and are as comfortable behind the wheel as you are when walking. Maybe, a little too comfortable. You seem to have forgotten that it is “the other guy” that you must be aware of. I predict bad fortune for you if you continue this way. (Stay in character, Drac)

So, let us begin with your past. Oh, my. I see that you are occasionally taking chances when you drive. I see that, as your mood changes, your driving habits change. I see that when you are having a bad day, you drive a little more aggressively. I see that, when your dispatcher gives you an impossible appointment, you agree to make it. Then, you curse him all the way there, as you dodge lanes and speed. However, I urge you to keep in mind that when you get a ticket, or worse, you will not be able to blame anyone but yourself. You may need to learn to speak-up when given these impossible tasks, before you embark on that miserable and dangerous journey. You have been lucky so far, but that could change in a moment.

As for the present, I see that you are sitting in a truck stop in California, waiting on two over-easy eggs with sausage and rye toast. You have the 10-4 Magazine in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other, and you’re thinking that I am all wrong and I am surely talking about somebody else. But there is a little voice inside your head that knows I am right, and that it is indeed you that I am addressing. You drop the magazine in horror as you realize that I really can see you in my mind’s eye. Then you pick it back up and continue, mesmerized. But then, suddenly, here comes your breakfast.

After breakfast, you head out to your truck with every intention of driving safely from here on, but the pressure is too much - or is it? You realize that you must travel through a big city today and you vow not to let the pressure get to you.

Wait, I’m getting a vision... I see you in a hospital bed. You’re saying that you didn’t think it could happen to you. You’re saying that it isn’t fair, because you are usually so safe and that you only made one little mistake. You wish you could take it back and do it all over, but sadly you cannot. You are wishing you could just rewind life a little bit, but it’s too late. The nurse comes in to adjust your traction devices and you want to ask her something, but you can’t because your jaw is wired shut. In the corner of the hospital room stands a doctor looking at your chart, with a sad face, and shaking his head from left to right.

I see another, different, future for you. I see you retired, with your lovely wife at your side. The two of you are smiling and enjoying a drink with a little umbrella in it, on a beach somewhere tropical. You hold your glass up and suggest a toast, a toast to safety. Cheers, for making it all those miles and still living to tell about it. Two cheers, for your 401K, which paid for this trip and then some. Three cheers, for not getting killed by a drunk driver, or a trucker who wouldn’t speak up to his dispatcher. As you celebrate your life and your success, you remember the article you read in 10-4 Magazine that fateful day, which really changed your life. (Alright, so I digressed a little bit)
Okay, drop the accent. Let’s get back to reality. Turn off the television and drive a stake through Drac’s chest. It’s just me and you now. Me, www.bigcitydriver.com and you, a trucker from way back. We both know that all it takes is one mistake and you could be in a wheelchair. Don’t let it happen. If you are always careful out there, I predict that safe travels and good fortune are far more likely in your future. And I’m not even psychic!

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