Don’t Be A Victim

In February we observe Valentine’s Day. It’s a day for couples to really emphasize their lovey dovey feelings for each other, or perhaps have a little courage and reveal a crush. Sadly, though, there are those who aren’t really feeling loved by their significant other – they are being belittled and abused by someone who claimed to love them once upon a time. And whether its verbal or physical abuse that’s being rendered, it’s still abuse, plain and simple. There is no excuse for it. How on earth could someone turn so disrespectful and flat-out violent toward someone they love? The fact is, in many abusive relationships, the man is the victim, but most are the other way around – men who are being controlling, physically abusive, belittling, or even neglecting their wives or girlfriends as a way of manipulating them or dominating them. It’s disgusting. There is help available, however, not only for the victims of such abuse, but for the aggressors, too. If you are on either side of an abusive relationship, I earnestly encourage you to seek help. To quote Scripture, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, reminds us that “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; love is not arrogant or rude; it does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things and endures all things.” This means that when you truly love someone, always seek what’s best for that person, above yourself. Abusing them is not a symptom of love. This month, I wrote a non-trucking-related poem to reach out to those who are victims of abuse. If you’re the victim, don’t convince yourself that it’s your fault or that you deserve it. If you are the aggressor, STOP NOW! Think about this person you fell in love with, and if the love is gone, just move on – and get help before it gets even worse.

IF YOU COULD SEE HER NOW!
By Trevor Hardwick

If you could see her then…
The way she looked at him…
Her heart was filled with joy,
The day she met that boy.

She set her spirit free…
And did it willfully…
She gave herself to him,
Oh, if you could see her then!

If you could see her then…
You’d see her reckless grin…
You’d hear her speak of him,
So glad she let him in.

You’d see a little girl…
Whose heart was set awhirl…
A glow upon her skin,
Oh, if you could see her then!

But something changed in him,
The love was growing dim.
His hands of love turned fierce,
Her heart was quickly pierced.

His words became too strong,
And all the love was gone.
He pushed her down one day,
And then she flew away.

If you could see her now…
She hides her face somehow…
A victim of assault,
She thinks it’s all her fault.

Her eyes are filled with tears…
Her heart is full of fears…
Her smile looks like a frown,
Oh, if you could see her now!

If you could see her now…
With bruises, black and brown…
Long sleeves and denim jeans,
You know what that stuff means.

There’s clearly no excuse…
For inflicting that abuse…
The damage lingers on,
Long after scars are gone.

In her mind, the words remain,
In her heart, she feels the pain.
But you’ll see, she won’t stay down,
Oh, if you could see her now!